I’ve gone back and forth debating whether or not I wanted to make my previous posts public. I recently learned that when it comes to recovery you are either all in or not. I can’t half ass this process and I am tired of the constant back and forth. Or what educated people would like to call relapse. My rehab is my own. I am owning what happened to me and moving on in a direction I know that will make me happier in the long run.
So when I say the walls are crumbling down again, it’s not to sound negative, even though throughout this process I may be a bit negative. But that’s a phase I know I will surpass. I feel being vulnerable is part of the process as well as making myself available to those who are struggling with the same situations.
I know I will never go back to who I was, and I don’t want to. I’m taking this “new” me and all the twists and turns, and I’m going to use it to my advantage. That’s really the only way I can keeping moving forward. Just taking it one emotion at a time, one day at a time.